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There are many ways to lose a pregnancyfrom the traditional bleeding in the toilet, to a missed miscarriage where you dont even know that you miscarried, to a blighted ovum where the baby never started growing at all, to an ectopic pregnancy, where the fetus implanted in the wrong place. Ive had most of themthey all suck, let me tell youand Ive learned the important ways to deal with a miscarriage. Chances are you were told in school that you could get pregnant any time you have sex so dont have Read more Read. First, you will probably be in shock. No matter how nervous you were about becoming a mom, no matter how skeptical you were of the pregnancy working out, you will be disappointed times a million. And as awful as this all issad and frustrating and emotionalthe first thing you have to do is figure out how to start or complete the miscarriage process. There are a number of ways to terminate a failed pregnancy and Ive done most of them. Naturally. This means you just let nature take its course. You wait for the bleeding to start and for the pregnancy to pass. For very early pregnancies, like chemical pregnancies which never registered a heartbeat, this is often the recommended route. My very first miscarriagewhere I didnt really know I was pregnant until the prior daypassed this way, and it felt like a really late period. Had I not taken three pregnancy tests, thats what I would have assumed it was. Some women prefer to do the natural way no matter how far along in their first trimester they are, but the downside is that you could be waiting a whilewhich totally creeped me out in my second miscarriage, knowing there was a non living fetus inside of me. Also, it could be super messy ditto on the creepy. And it can also be incomplete, sending you to surgery anyway see 3. The Pill. There is a pill that can help the miscarriage proceed fasterespecially if it already started. Misoprostol, which induces labor and for miscarriages is often given together with Mifepristone also can be messy and from what Ive heard, extremely painful. I was advised not to use this because you often end up in surgery anyway see 3. Surgery. As you can see from my previous two conclusions, I am a big fan of the surgical procedure to terminate a failed pregnancy, specifically the D C. I am not a doctor, so I cant give any medical advice except to tell you there are risks to every surgery. But as a patient, by my third miscarriage, I preferred this method of removing the contents of the uterus, usually under general anesthesia. There is a surgical procedure called aspiration which involves a vacuum and no general, but I found it awful to be awake, making conversation and watching everything happening. An ectopic pregnancy must be surgically removed. Heres why I preferred the D C Your pregnancy is terminated quickly and painlessly, for the most part. You dont have to witness any of the sad bloodshed. It is the most effective way of making sure everything is removed and to get you ready for your next pregnancy. MOST IMPORTANTLY and I cant stress this enough so Im going to give it a separate headline. Balika Vadhu 4Th December 2013 Written Updates there. Get It Tested. If you have surgery you can get what is medically called the products of conception tested. That means they can chromosomally test your fetus and see what, if anything, was wrong with it. For older patients, patients undergoing IVF, or in my non medical opinion, any patient, it is a great comfort to find out that something was wrong with the fetus, which is why it didnt make it. On the other hand, if they find out that there was nothing wrong with the babythat it was chromosomally normalyou can investigate other solutions to prevent it from recurring. In fact, Im such a fan of this method that by my 4thand finalmiscarriageI scheduled it right away so I could make sure not to lose my chance to test the products. Moving On. Its only after youve dealt with ending the miscarriage that the real loss may hit you youre not pregnant anymore. The sadness of this will be accompanied by actual physical symptoms, such as a drop in hormones those happy making chemicals that buoyed your bump. I myself often experienced a palpable gut wrench from the drop, as well as a weight gain that no doctor had warned me about. Look, Im not going to sugar coat this There was no good thing about any of my miscarriages. And most people didnt have any good things to say about it either, like, At least you can get pregnant. Thanks a lot. But maybe the one good thing that can come out of this is that I suffered through indecision and different procedures so you dont have to. Hopefully you can get through the physical part, so youll be free to focus on emotional healing and hopefully, get started trying again.